the xlog : x-rated weblog

a twisted and humorous look at sex, pornography, and the world in general

August 15, 2007

Ten Things About The Cock

Filed under: humor,photos,sex news — Simon @ 11:42 am

guy with his big cockCondom and cock sizes, circumcision, blue-balls, cock color, shoe sizes, masturbation, limp dicks, and the seam on a cock. Here some more interesting dinner table conversational tidbits for your quoting pleasure.

1. Only six percent of the male population needs extra-large rubbers, according to condom manufacturers. In other words, 94 percent of men lie about cock size.

2. The study most trusted by urologists shows that the average erect cock size is 5.1 inches long and 4.8 inches in girth. Unless you’re in a chat room. Then you can figure that every man there has a cock twice that size.

(those first two facts inspired the “Man with Large Cock” photo above)

3. About 80 percent of American men are circumcised, even though the American Academy of Pediatrics says it’s not medically necessary. No word on why men want to cut off part of something and then exaggerate its size later on.

4. Men really do get “blue-balls.” Technically called “prostatic congestion,” the achiness in the testicles is caused by “trapped” blood. And yes it’s true that a nice orgasm will definitely relieve the congestion, and the ache. But doctors say a warm shower or aspirin will also do the trick.

(click to read more…)

August 13, 2007

“Panty World 13” DVD review

boxcover-754-1715127.jpgDane Productions’ Panty World 13 is back with the undergarment fetish. Will it be enough to keep The Whackman’s attention? Let’s do this…

A corn-rowed cute faced, but small tittied slut named Ice in on the mind of Damian Michaels. While sniffing her pink panties, he envisions Ice touching herself using a cue ball and stick. Ice then walks in on Damian masturbating and decides to let him hit the skins. She gives him some good oral pleasure and then gets on her back to get her twat poked. Ice then sits on Damian and does a nice rotation on his cock. After, she is toppled while in doggy style to the end.

During a photo shoot, a girl next door looking bikini chick named Katrina does a photo spread with Brandon Iron as the photographer. After damn near nine minutes of buildup, they final start making out and get their foreplay on. Katrina is on her knees and does a slow, boring deep throat. Brandon speeds up the pace by skippin the eating session and plugging her cunt right away with his cock. Katrina gets on all fours and is a fucking mute throughout the whole scene. What the fuck Katrina?

Dave Hardman is beating his meat while flipping through a few porn mags. He begins to picture two cute chicks (a blonde named Bunny and an Asian chick named Jade) playing touchy feely with each other in a bathtub. The slow, sensual kissing and rubbing of the two wet sluts gets Dave off. It was a little too “in love” style and not “hardcore” enough for The [tag]Whackman[/tag] to get off on.

A peeping tom named Devon is violating the privacy of a hot blonde named Bunny Luv. He enters her room to sniff her white panties when Bunny leaves the room; then he continues to watch her from the closet as she tries on her different pairs of undies. Bunny begins to masturbate until she catches Devon watching her. Then Devon pulls out his cock and has Bunny touch it and taste it. While Bunny pulls her panties to the side, her pussy is hurricane tongued and then slitted by Devon’s thick cock. Bunny is then doggied before switching back to missionary. Her belly and new panties are splatted on—and Devon up and leaves with the quickness. Great closing!

Panty World 13 started and ended good, with the final five seconds being classic—dude gets up and leaves the moment he’s done releasing. Only 4 shots were fired off here, but they were good loads.

Check out some scenes from Panty World 13 here.

August 11, 2007

Terminator Sutra (or Schwarzenegger Sex?)

Filed under: commentary,humor,photos,sex news — Simon @ 12:01 pm

Terminators fuckingmore fucking terminators

Okay, maybe these arent’s shots of California’s governor having sex on the set of the next Terminator movie. But that’s what they made me think of when I ran across them. Actually the images below are from czar’s Flickr photoset “Make Love Not War.”

August 9, 2007

The Whackman reviews “Psycho Love” (DVD)

Psycho Love - DVD ReviewThe Whackman is stepping into the erotic, psychotic world of famed director Jerome Tanner. And this love ain’t just unconditional…this is
Psycho Love!

The good looking foreign red head Katja Kassin, who speaks with a hard accent, finally shuts the fuck up when she gets a cock shoved into her mouth. Katja gets her pussy eaten out in return. She then gets pounced on while sitting in a chair and after, does some pouncing of her own (first her cunt, then her ass gets worked) when she is on top of dude. Her dirty talk is all to the good.

Scene 2 is filled with dialogue. After over 7 minutes, the sexy Shy Love wraps her mouth around her man’s cock. Shy lies on her back and spreads her legs nice and wide to get hurricane tongued. She stays in that position to get thrusted by cock. Then she bounces her cunt on her man’s cock before getting drilled in doggystyle while standing up. For a chick named Shy Love, the bitch ain’t shy at all.

(Click here for some scenes from the movie…)(click to read more…)

August 8, 2007

Tokyo sex convention

Filed under: humor,sex news,video clips — Simon @ 8:21 am

Here’s a little 4 minute video from the Adult Treasure Expo held last month in Tokyo, Japan. We all know how much the Japanese people love gadgets of all kinds, and this video showcases some of the things you may find available from your favorite purveyor of adult toys sometime soon.

Some of the sex toys shown in the video are from Kanojo Toys, which sells some products direct from their website.

August 6, 2007

Porn Town USA – a DVD review by Whackman

Porn Town USAThe Whackman has entered Porn Town USA, where every man’s dreams come true. Based in the San Fernando Valley, porn capital of the world, The Whackman has landed in Utopia. Let’s do this…

In scene 1, a brunette fitness chick with blonde streaks named Aria yearns to get fucked by her man. Aria wastes no time taking her man’s cock deep into her throat. She then takes a seat to get her loose cunt French kissed and thrusted at a good pace. Aria sits on her man and her “yes yes yes” moans are annoying, but her passion is imminent. She then gets backdoored while in doggystyle and she catches all of dude’s cum in her mouth – bravo to that.

In scene 2, a sexy blonde named Laurie Wallace and a good looking brunette named Leshelle get some girl on girl action. Leshelle is on her knees feasting on Laurie’s pussy while Laurie stands up. Leshelle pulls out a dildo to use on Laurie and then they switch and Laurie gets on her knees to lick and finger Leshelle. Laurie pulls out a dildo to use on Leshelle and the compacted scene just ends abruptly.

(click to read more…)

August 4, 2007

Who the fuck needs 237 reasons to fuck?

Filed under: commentary,humor,sex news — Simon @ 1:10 pm

How about a nice cup of shut the fuck up?Some new research just published this month in the Archives of Sexual Behavior lists 237 reasons why people say they have sex.

According to the biggest study carried out into sexual motivations, these include that it is a “reasonably effective way of overcoming boredom”, helps you fall asleep, gets rid of a stress headache, to celebrate a special occasion, to get a promotion and to feel closer to God.

Other reasons include the desire for revenge, to keep warm on a chilly night, because someone dared me, because they felt sorry for someone, and in order to end a relationship.

Maybe it’s just me, but most of the reasons really seem to be the kind of justifications you think of afterwards. At the time, I bet there weren’t more than a handful of real reasons, with the top one being “because I wanted to.”

Click the link below to see the whole list of 237 reasons.

(click to read more…)

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