the xlog : x-rated weblog

a twisted and humorous look at sex, pornography, and the world in general

July 30, 2007

Asian Anal Addicts : a Whackman DVD review

Filed under: commentary,DVD Review,movie reviews,photos,video clips — Simon @ 10:10 am

The Whackman will have the pleasure of watching these Asian Anal Addicts swallow whole cocks with ease. Oral, anal, and threesomes are in The Whackman’s near future. These obedient oriental chicks better have a really tight asshole, because The Whackman wants to see how much they can take.

A Japanese 20 year-old decent-looking slut named Yumi is dressed in pink slut attire and plays with her beat up twat after a brief interview. A dude joins in and tongue wrestles with her pussylips while another dude gets his cock sucked by Yumi. The tongue wrestler then thrusts her cunt while she continues to suck off the other dude. She is then doggystyled before sitting on dude. While on her back, her ass gets penetrated until she takes the moneyshot in her mouth from both dudes.

In scene 2, a small tittied acned up chick named Jenny keeps her mouth full of two dudes cock. She then gets plugged and her pimpled out ass turns The Whackman the hell off. She gets doggystyled by a brave lad and it looks like her acne is about to fucking pop. Jenny then rides one dude while keeping her mouth wrapped around the other dude’s cock. She gets back in doggystyle before lying on her back to get the dickens. Her bj’s are amateurish, but The Whackman has to give her credit for being a good sport and taking a cock up the crapper like a champ.

(click to read more…)

July 28, 2007

World’s Largest Testicle Festival

Filed under: humor,photos,sex news — Simon @ 3:09 pm

testicle festivalsEvery year more than 15,000 fans descend on Rock Creek Lodge, just outside of Clinton, Montana, for Testy Festy, the world’s largest testicle festival.

Over the course of the five day event, the festival serves over two tons of bull balls to the hungry attendees. Which helps support its “I had a ball at the Testicle Festival” motto, which is plastered over shirts, hats and other items of all kinds.
click this text for full-size poster

Find a babysitter for the kids, because the rules here are “No kids, hassles or brought-in beverages.” Everyone must be over 21 years old, and you can expect to see some partially nude and some naked partyers at the bars, on the streets and at the bull-chip throwing contest, the wet t-shirt or hairy chest competitions, and even the bull-shit bingo.

By the way, while you’re in Montana, you can also check out the Fromberg Festival of Testicles near Billings, the Mission Mountain Testicle Festival in Branding Iron, the Ryegate Testicle Festival some 60 miles from Billings, and the York Bar’s Go Nuts Festival in York, Montana.

Testy Festy XXV website

July 26, 2007

DVD Review: “Blind Date” featuring Tera Patrick

boxcover-2482-3096536.jpgThe Whackman is cordially invited to go on Legend’s Blind Date with a couple of different whores. With Tera Patrick blindfolded on the cover, this is going to be an eager anticipation. Skip the wine and dining and let’s take this shit straight to the bedroom.

The gorgeous covergirl Sadie Jordan, better known to The Whackman as Tera “motherfuckin” Patrick, gets her knockers and juicy twat licked by her man. Sadie then wraps her luscious lips around her man’s cock oh so well. She is roughly thrusted from underneath at a pace The Whackman can appreciate. Then, Sadie turns around and gets on her knees to take the continued pulverizing doggystyle. She lies on her back and takes her man to the promise land.

A fuckable schoolgirl looking chick named Gia sensually goes down on her no-strings-attached fuck buddy. They continue their oral exam in the 69. Gia then gets drilled with cock while lying on her back. She gets on all fours to get the dickin from behind. Then, its reverse cowgirl and she pounces in a “making love” type of fashion…it looked more like a love scene than a one-nite-stander.

(click to read more…)

July 24, 2007

Another Damn Coverup: Nude town bans nudity!

Filed under: humor,photos,sex news — Simon @ 8:09 am

nude girl in the parkJust a week after a naked, elderly tourist freely strolled down Brattleboro’s main street, Vermont’s infamous naked town is under orders to keep its pants on.

On Tuesday, by a margin of just 3 votes to 2, town officials passed an emergency rule which bans nudity on the main roads and within 250 feet of any school or place of worship, among other places. The ordinance defines nudity as the showing of genitalia, buttocks or female breasts; a provision allows breast-feeding in public. Naked violators will be fined face a $100.

Tiny Brattleboro has long been a live-and-let-live kind of place where skinny dipping was a rite of summer. Last summer, though, it began flirting with a nudity ban after a group of teens took to hanging around a downtown parking lot in the buff. Officials decided then to let winter take care of the problem and never voted.

It took an elderly man wearing only a fanny pack and wandering through the center of town last week for the Select Board to decide it had seen enough. The nudists and their fans still get a say in the matter: Next month, Brattleboro will hold a public hearing on whether the ordinance should be made permanent.

July 22, 2007

Pimped By An Angel 3 (a Whackman DVD review)

Filed under: DVD Review,movie reviews,photos,pornstars,video clips — Simon @ 11:12 am

Pimped by an Angel DVDEvery Pimp Dies… Not Every Pimp Lives. Given a second chance by the O.G. in the sky, Mac Daddy returns to Earth as an angel… destined to pimp worldly ho’s for all of eternity. Pimped by an Angel 3 chronicles the afterlife of a young pimp shot down in his prime. This is his story, bizniatches!

Dressed in all pink (with even a pink wig to match), the gorgeous Hannah Harper and Asian slut Mia Smiles go downtown on a pimp at a bar for all to see. After sharing dude’s cock in their mouths, Hannah sits on Mia’s face while dude eats out Mia. Then Mia reclines on dude’s face while Hannah rides his cock. Mia gets doggystyled while shoving a huge dildo into Hannah and the beautiful moaning is heating up The Whackman. Hannah lies on her back to get her pussy thrusted by dude, while Mia dildo’s herself and all is well that end’s well. Great opening scene.

A brunette angel named Venus deep throats the hell out of a cock. She then gets her cunt and ass fingered and eaten. Finally, 10 minutes into the scene, Venus bounces wildly on dude’s cock and let The Whackman tell you—this bitch likes it fucking rough and hard. Dude keeps up the fast pace when turning Venus around and putting her on all fours. Venus then invited his cock into her ass while she made her knees touch her shoulders. Venus gets a pass to The Whackman’s bed anytime she needs some good roughneck lovin.

(click to read more…)

July 20, 2007

Your breasts are going to have to move

Filed under: humor,photos,sex news — Simon @ 7:15 am

busty bus passengerA German bus driver threatened to throw a woman off his bus because he said she was too sexy and her cleavage was distracting him.

The passenger, 23-year-old Deborah Moscone, said she’d been sitting at the front wearing a low-cut T-shirt, when the driver stopped. He reportedly opened the door and shouted at her: “Your cleavage is distracting me every time I look in my mirror and I can’t concentrate. If you don’t sit somewhere else, I’m going to have to throw you off the bus”

Deborah changed seats and later complained to the bus company, which defended their driver, saying: “The bus driver is allowed to do that and he did the right thing. A bus driver cannot be distracted because it’s a danger to the safety of all the passengers.”

You know, the traffic must be really, really bad in that part of Germany.

By the way, if you’re not driving a bus right now, you can go check out these big tits movie galleries and big tits movie free sites.

July 18, 2007

DVD Review: “Rhythms In Blue”

boxcover-730-1715079.jpgThe rhythm is in the women. The blue is for how your balls felt before watching these whores. These extremely horny honies get rammed, jammed, and fucked into oblivion. These sluts fuck and move with the Rhythms In Blue. Let’s dance…

In scene 1, the succulent blonde Tracy (Ava Vincent) gets her neatly trimmed muff tongued down. Tracy devours her man’s cock to return the favor; and then she lies on her back to get thrusted in her pussy with some cock. She is then uppercutted from underneath before getting on her hands and knees to get the doggy treatment. Tracy was in lazy mode as dude did all the work.

In scene 2, the captivating blonde Marcia (Alexandra Silk) goes down on her musician bad boy. Marcia lifts up her summer dress and her man sees she has no panties on, so he feasts on her twat while fingering it. Marcia is then pounded missionary style on the couch and her dirty, confident mouth turns The Whackman on. She is then doggystyled for a good while and then sidewayed in her cunt until she takes a chin shot.

(click to read more…)

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